September 23, 2006

THE REAL (ESTATE) STORY
By Larry Underhill

MY READERS are as wacky as I am! (Except YOU, of course). Judging from the feedback, most of my Saturday faithful seem to be afflicted with the same streak of weird humor that I enjoy. Thank you. I’ll stop apologizing for the nutty jokes…although this one may stretch you a bit:

TWO FISH swam into a concrete wall. One turned to the other and said, “DAM!”

ON TO REAL ESTATE: Have I mentioned the THIRTY-THOUSAND DOLLAR REDUCTION at 219 Cedarwood Court lately? 2242 square feet of two-story home with four bedrooms and two and a half baths. This tile-roofed home is getting a LOT of interest since it was dropped to $439,950! Call for a private showing, or attend today’s…OPEN HOUSE! Statesman’s Greg Adams will hold 219 Cedarwood Court open today from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m.! Come by and say Hello.

MOTIVATED SELLERS! 2818 Battleview Place in North Stockton was recently reduced $10,000 to $349,950! Almost 1700 square feet with NEW carpet, NEW vinyl flooring, and NEW dishwasher! Sellers say composition roof is about five years old. Laundry Room! Three bedrooms, two baths, Living Room AND Family Room. Wet bar in Family Room! TWO shop rooms in oversized garage! Great neighborhood, too. Call for a private showing.

JUST LISTED! 9225 Little Creek Circle is 2064 square feet of two-story Stockton home with a LOT of special upgrades. FOUR bedrooms. THREE full baths. THREE-car garage with one car-space converted to an office or extra room. Laundry Room with cabinets. Cheery and spacious Master Suite with deep walk-in closet and Bruce real-wood flooring (Not laminate!). You’ll find Bruce flooring in several other rooms along with other touches that will surprise you! At $439,950, this is more bang for your buck than you might be able to find in other areas. Call me for details!

MILLION-DOLLAR Lake Camanche VIEW! 3 Willet Court, on the corner of Willet and Goshawk in desirable Wallace Lake Estates, offers the charm of the country only minutes from Lodi! 1876 square feet on a third of an acre. Enjoy the Lake view from your own hilltop home! Master Suite downstairs! Three bedrooms, two and a half baths. New built-in spa! More! Come see. Only twenty minutes from Lodi (depending on who’s driving). $469,950!

OPPORTUNITY: 515 Sandpiper Circle offers 1412 square feet of single-story home for the RECENTLY-REDUCED price of $349,950. These motivated Sellers want to sell SOON! Location, location. Offers considered!

CHECK OUT 1516 Mariposa Drive, now at its new price of $325,000! Dual-pane windows! Central heat and air! Large covered patio! Great Westside location!

SPEAKING OF FISH (See above): What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. That’s the last stupid joke I’ll inflict upon you for at least a week. See you next Sat! Have a great one.

Statesman Realty Lodi, CA
(209)333-2380
1-800-407-SOLD(7653)
www.LarrySellsLodi.com
www.larryunderhill.com
Email: Larry@LarryUnderhill.com

September 16, 2006

THE REAL (ESTATE) STORY
By Larry Underhill

TWO ANTENNAS met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

Sorry. My friend Chuck Deeter blessed (?) me with a slug of “punderful” jokes, all silly, some old as the hills. I can’t help myself. I’m going to inflict a few on YOU if you stick with me to the end of the column.

TWO CANNIBALS are eating a clown. One says to the other, “Does this taste funny to you?”

PRICE REDUCED! 1818 Mimosa Drive is now $399,950 for almost 1800 square feet of two-story charm! Near-new 50-year composition ROOF! Upgraded window treatments! More! Nothing left to do here. This is a clean, sharp home. Call me for a private showing.

DEJA MOO: The feeling that you’ve heard this bull before.

JUST LISTED: 2074 Mammoth Way! Built in 2003, this 2247-square-foot home has over $5,000 in custom interior paint and decorating AND a spacious covered patio in back! Previously listed for fifty thousand dollars more, the new price of $539,950 makes this home the best in its class.

A JUMPER CABLE walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.”

“DOC, I can’t stop singing “The Green, Green Grass of Home.”
“That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.”
“Is it common?”
“Well, It’s Not Unusual.”

ANOTHER PRICE REDUCTION (FIFTY THOUSAND BUCKS’ WORTH!): 1705 Cape Cod Circle (Corner of Cape Cod and Lakeshore) has 2315 square feet of potential! This two-story three-bedroom two and a half bath home has an older shake roof, but roof inspector Larry Peters says that after minor repairs, he can issue a two-year roof certification. When you consider the new price of $399,950, this home is a value.

MAHATMA GANDHI, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail, and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him (I apologize in advance) a super-callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

AND FINALLY (You thought it would never end), there was the person who sent twenty different puns to his friends with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

Have a great week! See you next Sat.

Statesman Realty Lodi, CA
(209)333-2380
1-800-407-SOLD(7653)
www.LarrySellsLodi.com
www.larryunderhill.com
Email: Larry@LarryUnderhill.com

September 9, 2006

THE REAL (ESTATE) STORY
By Larry Underhill

I DROPPED my oldest daughter Heather and my son-in-law Joel Swenddal at the Pleasanton BART station. They took the train into SFX and then flew across the sea. Yesterday they finished their first week as “Heather Teacher” and “Joel Teacher” at a private school in South Korea. They signed a contract to teach English for a YEAR there. So far, so good! Learning English is a high priority in most Asian countries, so they received offers from many schools. Their first night in South Korea, their school administrator took them to dinner…at T.G.I. Friday’s!

THEY SAY parenthood is a constant process of letting go. It’s true. My mind flashes back to the first time I left Heather at pre-school. She was screaming and clutching my hand. A bystander would have thought I was feeding her to wolves. “It’s better if you leave quickly,” a kindly gray-haired teacher suggested. I did, but it was hard to go. (Heather settled down the minute I left).

I EXPERIENCED that same “parental ache” with each of my three as I prayed with them in the car before they walked into school. From pre-school to high school, the drill never varied. Parenthood IS an ongoing process of learning to let go…but the joy of launching your kids into the world, of cheering them on and being there for them to lean on when life rears up and smacks them, that’s precious.

CONGRATULATIONS to Charles and Rita Martin on their successful purchase of a near-new Lodi home! They’re excited and happy. I think my Dad’s tomatoes may have had something to do with their decision to buy this particular home. My parents live in the neighborhood, and my father loves to give tomatoes from his back yard garden to deserving recipients. The Martins can look forward to more tomatoes in the future. It wasn’t actually in the purchase contract, but it’ll happen!

THANK YOU also to Realtor David Pfenning, who represented the Seller in this adventure. Thanks, David!

RIDE FOR LIFE! My Harley-ridin’ pastor, Tim Stevenson, and anybody who’d like to come along will gather at Horizon Community Church TODAY for a benefit Ride For Life. Registration is from 8 to 9 this morning at Horizon (446 Fairway Drive in Galt..the old bowling alley/bingo hall, now a nicely remodeled church building). The posse leaves the church at 9:30 today for Murphys Park in the lovely foothill burg of…Murphys, of course! This is a benefit for Lodi’s Pregnancy Resource Center. Ride your motorcycle, drive your classic car, or come in your soccer-mom minivan! The cost is $25.00 per person, which is a DEAL considering the following:

BARBECUE AND LIVE MUSIC! A little blues (I’ll hold up the blues-harp end of things), a little country twang (Garydon Ricks can’t HE’P hisself), a jumpin’ band (Semper Fi), and a lot of good food and friendly people. All of this in a lush tree-shaded park with Murphys Creek running through it. What’s not to like? Hope to see you today. It’s a good cause. Have a great week!

Statesman Realty Lodi, CA
(209)333-2380
1-800-407-SOLD(7653)
www.LarrySellsLodi.com
www.larryunderhill.com
Email: Larry@LarryUnderhill.com

September 2, 2006

THE REAL (ESTATE) STORY
By Larry Underhill

HUGE CONGRATULATIONS to Lodi’s newest real estate Broker, Greg Adams. Greg just passed the (fairly brutal) California State Broker’s Exam. His Broker’s license is on the way!

Greg’s a veteran of nearly two hundred Lodi-area real estate transactions. As my right-hand Realtor, he assists me in serving my clients from listing to closing and beyond. Greg also reviews the transactions for my little band of Realtors. He’s Statesman’s Go-To-Guy Numbah Two, right behind me. I’m blessed to have him.

AND BY THE WAY: In addition to assisting me with my real estate practice, Greg has his own portfolio of happy clients. Remember the old adage, “If you want something done, ask a busy person”? That saying was written about Greg. Active at Bethel Open Bible Church. On the Board of Directors for Lodi’s Pregnancy Resource Center. Husband to Erika for 40 years (She gets a medal). Father of four. Grandpa to NINE assorted grandchillens. This guy’s got it goin’ on! Give him a high five when you see him.

ANOTHER LISTING INTO ESCROW! Homes are still selling…when they’re priced right.

SPEAKING of price…REDUCED! 2818 Battleview Place in North Stockton has just been reduced $10,000 to $349,950! Nearly 1700 square feet with NEW carpet, new lino, and new dishwasher! Sellers say composition roof is about five years old. Laundry Room! Three bedrooms, two baths, Living Room AND Family Room. Wet bar in Family Room! TWO shop rooms in oversized garage! My Sellers tell me, “We want to SELL this home before fall.” Good news for you.

THIRTY-THOUSAND DOLLAR REDUCTION! 219 Cedarwood Court was a good value at the old price. 2242 square feet of two-story home with four bedrooms, two and a half baths, and owners who have made this home better than brand-new! Completed in 2004, this tile-roofed beauty should sell quickly at this new price: $439,950! Call for a private showing.

JUST LISTED! MILLION-DOLLAR VIEW of Lake Camanche! 3 Willet Court is on the corner of Willet and Goshawk in desirable Wallace Lake Estates, where the deer and the antelope play. (Okay, no antelope, but deer are sighted regularly!). 1876 square feet on a third of an acre. Enjoy the Lake view from your own hilltop home! Master Suite downstairs! A total of three bedrooms, two and a half baths. New built-in spa! More! Come see. Only twenty minutes from Lodi. $469,950 if you hurry!

ALSO REDUCED: 515 Sandpiper Circle offers 1412 square feet of single-story home for the new price of $349,950. Motivated Sellers need a quick sale! Don’t be shy…Offers considered!

“THE BEST INDEX to a person’s character is (a) how he treats people who can’t do him any good, and (b) how he treats people who can’t fight back.” Abigail Van Buren said that, and I like it! Have a happy week! See you next Sat.

Statesman Realty Lodi, CA

(209)333-2380

1-800-407-SOLD(7653)

www.LarrySellsLodi.com

www.larryunderhill.com

Email: Larry@LarryUnderhill.com

August 26,2006

THE REAL (ESTATE) STORY
By Larry Underhill

EVER TRIED to drink out of a full-on fire hose? As I write this week’s rant, I’m sifting through the wealth of experiences of the past week. Here are some impressions:

THE CHICAGO CAB DRIVER was from Ethiopia. He was a little difficult to understand, but if you think about it, his English is a LOT better than my (zero) fluency in his native tongue. Licensed as a medical technician in his native land, he’s working long days in his newly-adopted country as he pursues his medical training …and studies to obtain American citizenship. He loves this Land of Opportunity.

I’M IMPRESSED with the leadership of our National Association of Realtors. One speaker stood out. Dr. David Lereah is NAR’s Senior Vice President and Chief Economist. He delivered a “Real Estate Reality Check” with some surprising information. The real estate market is still EXPANDING in 31 percent of the country while it CONTRACTS in the other 69 percent. The good news is that, from his extremely credible point of view, he expects the current general slide in real estate values to have a ‘soft landing” unlike previous market corrections. He had a long list of reasons that support his position. Hope he’s right!

ANOTHER SALE into the pipeline! Greg Adams and the rest of my Team took care of bizness during my short absence. Of course, I burned up the cell-phone airwaves from time to time, but that’s the advantage of the times we live in. You can do business from anywhere!

A LITTLE MORE about my new listing at 515 Sandpiper Circle: This place is a bit of a fixer, but it’s priced accordingly! 1412 square feet on a secluded circle. Three bedrooms, two baths, laundry room, pull-down attic storage in garage. Needs a new roof, new floor coverings, and paint. At $352,500, what’s not to like?

THE BLUES is alive and well in Chicago. I conducted research in two famous blues establishments: Buddy Guy’s Legends on Wabash and The Kingston Mines, which I happened to visit on a special night. Koko Taylor, known as “The Queen of the Blues” and recently inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, was there with her band. The occasion was a benefit for Koko’s foundation, which helps blues musicians (who are not generally known for their attention to financial planning) with medical bills. Great music. Decent food, too.

REDUCED! 1921 Edgewood Court! Lakewood schools! Quarter-acre landscaped lot with fruit trees, grapes, berries, more!! Possible RV parking! 1791 square feet of comfortable home with 3 bedrooms, 2.5 baths, upgraded kitchen and more! Was a great value at $439,950. And now? $419,950!

THE MASTERMIND SUMMIT in San Diego was the best yet. Back in 1997 when I first joined Brian Buffini’s program, I was the only Lodi-area Realtor involved. Now there are dozens of Realtors and lenders enjoying the benefits of building a by-referral real estate practice using Brian’s training..

FOOD CONT’D: Best Chicago-style deep-dish pizza: Gino’s East. If you go, bring a Sharpie to write something witty on the walls along with everyone else’s scribbles. Have a great week! See you next Sat.

Statesman Realty

(209) 333 2380

1-800-407-SOLD (7653)

Website: www.larrysellslodi.com

Website: www.larryunderhill.com

Email: Larry@LarryUnderhill.com

August 19, 2006

THE REAL (ESTATE) STORY
By Larry Underhill

AS THIS PAPER hits your flower bed, I’m wrapping up a short visit to Chicagoland. In addition to Chicago-style hot dogs and Chicago-style pizza and Chicago blues, I hope to have learned something at the National Association of Realtors’ Leadership Summit. Every year, the incoming Prez of the Lodi Association of Realtors is invited to attend the Summit in Chicago. Current President Paul Mertz came home last year singing the praises of the Windy City, as did those who came before him. I’m following the tradition.

REDUCED AGAIN…and such a value! 1818 Mimosa is a one-of-a-kind two-story home in the desirable Whispering Oaks community. One square foot shy of 1800 feet! Three bedrooms, two and a half baths! New 50-year composition roof! Laundry room! Immaculate interior with freshly painted walls! Refrigerator included! There’s more to say, but I want to surprise you. Call us for a private showing! The new price: $415,000. Going, going…

TODAY I FLY to San Diego for a little more training: the annual Mastermind Summit put on by Buffini and Company. Gotta learn how to serve you bettah! (San Diego is easy to take, too). In my absence, my right-hand Realtor Greg Adams is at the helm. I’m currently negotiating the sale of one of my listings, listing another property, and meeting the needs of over a dozen clients. I couldn’t go ANYWHERE without Greg’s steady hand on the tiller! If events unfold as usual, I’ll return to a SOLD listing or two and other positive developments. Between Greg, Debbie Mason (my Director of First Impressions) and my son Tom (Research Assistant, “I.T. Guy” and all-around support feller), my clients hardly know I’ve been away. (My cell phone DOES run up a few hours on every trip as I keep in touch with the office, however).

CONGRATULATIONS to Steve and Jennifer McGill (and daughter Danae) on the successful close of escrow on their home! I first met Steve when he and his two sisters rented one of my properties back in the eighties. At the time, Steve was younger than Danae is now! I’ve helped the McGills through their real estate adventures over the years, and they’re always a joy to work with.

EXAMPLE: As we sat at their kitchen table evaluating the market and deciding where to price their home, they actually took my suggestion and priced their home aggressively! The result: THREE offers (one stupid, two do-able). We leveraged the interest in the home into a sale price ten thousand bucks over the asking price. In this current market! Ninety percent of the “marketing strategy” necessary to getting a home SOLD is proper pricing.

CONGRATULATIONS ALSO to veteran Realtor Joyce Ferreira, who brought the Buyers to this adventure. Thanks, Joyce! Let’s do another one soon!

ANOTHER PRICE REDUCTION at 219 Cedarwood Court in Lodi! 2242 square feet of two-year-old home for $464,950? Yup. Not a misprint. Four bedrooms and two full baths upstairs, a half bath (off of the laundry room) downstairs! Cul-de-sac lot! Better than brand-new. Come and see!

SWEET HOME CHICAGO…It’s been fun. Gotta go! Have a great week! See you (live and in color) next Sat. Sooner, if you need me. Just call!

Statesman Realty Lodi, CA

(209)333-2380

1-800-407-SOLD(7653)

www.LarrySellsLodi.com

www.larryunderhill.com

Email: Larry@LarryUnderhill.com